Why Don't You..?

Diana Vreeland wrote a column full of audacious advice for Harper’s Bazaar entitled ‘Why Don’t You..’

Her suggestions ranged from the vaguely practical ‘ rinse your blond child’s hair in dead champagne to keep its gold, as they do in France’ to the slightly less manageable ‘have a private staircase from your bedroom to the library with a needlework carpet with notes of music worked on each step – the whole spelling your favourite tune’ to the charmingly absurd ‘do your closet shelves in immaculate white organdy, pleated, with Lubin’s scented pink flannels wrapped around your things ‘. Actually I’d probably go for the organdy if I didn’t have to pleat it. Doesn’t everyone have an endless supply of scented pink flannels?


My random recommendations for enlivening the anxious days of the credit crunch are surely more grounded?

- Make a poker work sign for your desk saying ‘These Things Shall Pass’ and only contemplate it on bad days.


- Ladies, be independent of fashion, and wear a cashmere sweater on your head arranged anywhere between a turban and a wimple and fastened with a large piece of costume jewellery (a la Little Edie Beale)

- Gentlemen, whilst out shopping with your wife slip away and buy a bunch of flowers. When she’s at the hands of a particularly snooty shop assistant, tap her on the shoulder and thrust the bouquet into her hands with the words ‘I wonder if your husband would mind me giving you these?’ (One scented flower head in a screw-top jar will do if you’re short of cash)

- Only if you’re supple, practise tumbling and enter a party with a cartwheel followed by a double somersault. Check your underwear first.

- As a token of your affection, write your very best friend or lover a cheque for a million pounds/dollars (and pray he or she won’t try to cash it).

- Start starching and ironing your bed linen for the Five Star hotel feeling you can no longer afford. (Only real starch will do. A spray can will give you repetititve strain injury.)

- Buy yourself a silver-plated teapot and some bone china off e-bay and make your own tea ceremony. Take a tray to a sunny spot and sit there for at least half an hour.

- Buy a pair of sheepskin slippers and polish the parquet by skating around toThe Blue Danube.

- Save on product by giving your hair a final rinse with beer. (Lager won’t do) You won’t really smell like a brewery and your hair will bounce and shine.

- For silky milky skin exfoliate with a handful of wet porridge oats and hope somebody else will clean the shower tray afterwards.

- Finally, download Judy Garland’s Trolley Song and The Can Can to your i-player for days when the sun won’t shine.

The Eternal Head Scarf

I don't know about you, but I go in and out of headscarves darling! I wish I was joking. I love the things because Jacqmar silk squares featured strongly in my childhood. My mother's bridge friends would come round in the afternoon and leave their scarves with their scented fur coats over the banisters. I would compare the designs, try them on and replace them very carefully. I also remember being amazed when my eldest sister was given half a dozen Jacqmar scarves for her 21st birthday.




I had some gorgeous Hermes scarves in the 70s, the most conventional era of my life, and then suddenly got embarrassed by them so they ended up in the dressing up box, or as the world's most upmarket security blanket for one of my kids. Ouch. Ouch. Who would have guessed they'd be rehabilitated in the 1980s as must-haves and collectors' items?

And now, apparently, headscarves are the fashion accessory du jour, or were when I last looked. All over the autumn/winter collection catwalks, tied conventionally under the chin. Kate Moss has been known to wear one! This reminded me of a delicious book I have, The Scarf by Andrew Baseman [pub. Stewart, Tabori & Chang NY 1989] and I shall now revisit it and indulge my nostalgia.




The One That Got Away. Hermes 'Promenade de Longchamps' (1970)


Elsie de Wolfe moves the scarf knot from under the chin to the side of her neck



Diana Vreeland styles the model Bijou (1942)



My all-time favourite. Dior's "Roses sur Paris" (mid 1950s)



Bernard Buffet design (c 1959)


Emilio Pucci (1960s)



Detail: 'Hera' by Liberty. The famous peacock feather pattern was designed in 1887 by Arthur Silver




And finally, the world's most iconic wearer of the headscarf, Queen Elizbeth II with USA President Ronald Reagan riding at Windsor 1982

Photo copyright Arthur Edwards

Image at top courtesy shesinvogue.blogspot.com; Jacqmar scarf at http://www.samayalingvintage.com